hmm,
just read some old conver between me&you.
kinda miss you.
i havent gave up,i still care for you.
i know you had given up on me&given up waiting.
but you are the one that will make me smile everytime i see you.
i am trying hard to find it back but it seems hard.
equally hard for you to get back the conver with me.
i tried talking to you,but it dont seems to be working.
iknew you found someone you love now,we are on the same boat,i guess.
my love for you is true.its in my heart,i didnt take it out&it doesn't move any single bit.
i guess you knew about it but you are trying to ignore?
i am unsure.
i am always hoping that you won't ignore me?
i guess thats enough.
i regretted,i know its pointless to say anymore.
in the past,
whenever i am sick,you will always want me to keep you updated,
i feel down,you are the one that will cheer me up.
when i am stressed up,you will give me advise to help me up no matter you are doing tutorial or busy with stuffs.
i hope i can stay at that moment without changing.
BUT just in a few months,everything changes.
changes very fast.all these had gone down the drain&flown away.
i tried to save it back but its all wet&you told me to forget it,
you told me to let it go.
everything is different now,not the same anymore.
i hope it can be the same but its all different,i guess i am the one to blame.
i cant hate you cause i am the one that is making all this,
i should blame myself for not treasuring all that.
i hope you will know,
i still love you.
what i know is,my true love is you.
you are always in my heart.no one had ever made me feel this way.
you will never be replace...

15thfeb2008
NPCC NPCC NPCC
when for npcc in the afternoon,
actually,i am having a clear mind&happy mood to go for NPCC but half way through the training,
the fat ass shouted "HEY HONGYING!YOU ARE A xxx ?!HEARD FROM SxxxxN YOU LIKE gxxx?!"
knn la !whats the problem with you about lxx ?!
its legal in singapore okay?!
what if i go out telling people you are a gxx?! how will you feel?
&so i went to ask SxxxxN what he told the fat ass,SxxxxN went to ask him.
the best part is the fat ass gave us a freaking innocent face&said"no,i didnt say anything,i dont know anything."
fcuk off la ! since is you said out then just admit la,why must say until like that?
do you know that it is an insult to me?
DO YOU EVER KNOW HOW I FEEL?
I FEEL HURT,I FEEL INSULTED,MY HEART IS BROKEN !!! ='(
after training,went to have a talk with SXXXXN,after that,all the CIs&MsLee knew about it,
MsLee brought SXXXXN to one corner and talk while BxxxxN brought me to the canteen to talk.after here&there,SxxxxN apologise to me.
BxxxxN gave him a lecture,
at that moment,i didnt cry.i wanted to be strong-althought its hard la.
i went into the toilet&saw mone&jl,.
i hugged mone and started crying.
it hurts la.
let me tell you boy,
you can say you dont mean it,you can say sorry to me.
but when the knife snab into my heart,the scar will never going to heal,its painful.
this scar will be with me my secondary life until i didnt see you or even my whole life.
i am only 15years old&i had already a scar in my heart.
outerside of me i can be happy,i can be cheerful but deep in my heart,who knows how i feel?
you people out there can say its just a small thing only,why must get so sad over it ?
you guys can say,since you are one then why must you be so sad?
BUT can you imagine not?he will trying to tell the whole world about it!maybe you all cant understand how i feel&i also dont know how to describe how i am feeling BUT what i can say is,IT HURTS !!!!!
shall stop this...
after i had changed&stuff,went makan with deidre, jeremy,hong xiang,mone&seri.
tried to forget what happened and be extreme crazy.hiding the pain.
after dinner,went jalan jalan thn jeremy send me home&hongxiang send mone home.
special thanks to benson that is there for me,mone for your hug=D and jeremy that send me home.
NPCC is a family that i feel that i am loved.
i will hardly feel neglected there.ILOVEYOU GUYS =D
another day with another story

express your love to the person

VALENTINE VALENTINE VALENTINE
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY PEOPLE=D
i spend my day well in school,having lots of fun.
let me start the day,
damn freaking angry with my mum in the morning,
i told her i have to reach school early to do my stuff.
she said okay,after we left the house&already half way through the journey,she said she forgot to bring her lunch. DAMN IT ! at that moment,i am damn pissed off can?
reached school at the same time=.= its NOT early at all.
LESSON LESSON LESSON
lesson time damn boring,wanted to sleep but no chance.haix.
the journey is so long.HAHAHAHAS.
yeasterday night or i can say today morning, 3plus then sleep but in the morning 5 need to wake up already,who will not tired?
saw Kenneth Teo while we were walking to the canteen during recess, make fun of him,whenever we see him we will say this "Good Morning MrTeo."hahas.
then he will give us those weird weird face.LOLS.
today my class damn funny,keep making MdmTan.
is like today all her lesson,the last mins,our class will start to count down.
is like their watch is so accurate."5,4,3,2,1,0"*ding-dong-ding-dong....*
my funny 3A=D
last period she came in for A-maths,
she wants to give us practices to practice,
"MdmTan,you not tired ar?you not tired but we are tired le leh."said by Darrel.*laughs*
BUT still,HAVE TO DO..eeeyer=(
AFTER SCHOOL...
after lesson,met hubby to exchange our valentine's gift before she need to go to work.HAHAHAHA..
at that moment,how i wish there is a bed for me to lie on.so tired la.
PRESENTS PRESENTS PRESENTS...
special thanks for those that gave me presents,
i really appreciated it.its really very touch.
millon thanks=D
first on the list,
thanks simone for the fresh flower,the colour is sweet.
i promise i will take care of it well=D
next,
thanks ChengWee for the chocolate,
was surprised that you will give=D
coming up,
thanks MelissaPTS for giving me that two heart-shaped cookies.
it look nice&i will treasure it=D
next,
thanks BeeGeok for the chocolate,
i like that chocolate very much.HAHAHAHAS=D
next,
special thanks to Prefectorial board for the test tube&Stephanie for all her hard work.
THANK YOU !
somemore to go,
thanks to Joel&Keith,i guess.
thanks for the bear,i like it very much.
LAST BUT NOT LEAST,
always leave the best for the last.
THANKS HUBBY FOR YOUR PRESENT=D
the best present i received this year.
thanks for the roses you folded,star you folded,chocolates inside&of course the POOH!!!
HAHAHAHAS.
also hope you will like the things i did for you=D muacks<3

i think thats all for today?if have later will post again.
once again,HAPPY V-DAY=D

everything remains the same afterall

LOVE LOVE LOVE
everything is back into the square one with you.
that few days,i am just crazy&mad.
mad about him?i guess so.
today i sat down&have a deep thought,
we two really gone through a lot,real lot.
we had walk through together all the thicks&thins.
we made through all the obstacles.
you made me feel what is love,
you let me know how is it like when you are being loved.
you made me feel every single thing.
me life is at your hand&YES i love you lots.
i wish everything is going fine now uh?
i think you are the only one that is fit to be my valentine isnt it?
you made me fall deeply into you.
whatever you do,you made my heart melts.
NOW !!!
i am DESPERATLY in LOVED.
be my last,will you?
13012007;13012008
one year twenty-four days&i am still counting...
HAPPY CNY !!!! =DD
its a new year again&its time to collect lots of ang baos =D
today today today.
nothing much happens but just gamble,eat&still gamble.
thanks baby for accomanying me today.
see you tomorrow&tomorrow is my lunar birthday=D
night...

EVERYDAY IS A NEW SURPRISE=D

WHEN I SEE YOU,IT HURTS ME MORE
although this morning i saw you with a smiling face,but deep in my heart,it hurts like mad.
i remembered what happened that day.
that day is equal the day you took a knife and snab into my heart and the scar stay.
nothing can make it recover,nothing can cure it.
once its there,it will always be there,i guess.
the cut is deep.
the happier you are,the more hurt i got.
i am suffering,but yet you are laughing there.
maybe YES,i want to see you smile and be happy but it hurts.
i had care for you much more then i care myself.
you see the scars on her hand?
all those scars;
Dont worry.
they're little notes to remind her how
many times you broke her heart.
i love you
SCHOOL SCHOOL SCHOOL
today had the CNY celebration=D
the whole celebration was sitting with CW chit-chating.
in the morning,
talked with mr peh regarding some stuff.hmmm..things doesnt seems to well done.
hongying,this is not up to your standard uh?
maybe i am stressed up with stuffs&getting tired with it.
every night also not enough sleep-sickening.
after talking with MrPeh,went back to class&found out that ONGLANQUE is not in school !!!!!
how dare she......LOL=.=
so we were having english lesson&today's topic is DEBATING!
its what i love most=D
i love to have verbal fight.hahas.
during celebration,saw a couple of my seniors and chatted abit with them.
after school,went hougang mall with CW to do the name stuff.
then went makan.
saw huifen at the scalator.hahas.(dont wu hui,its only my friend =D)
homesweethome after that.
NPCC NPCC NPCC
my dear squad mates,dont disappoint us again&again can?
just come back for training please...
because of this,i can even break-down.
just come back for training&speech day alright?

afterall,
boy,i still love you so.

THE GUY THAT I ONCE MAKE HIM MY SUPERHERO
Yesterday marked the beginning.
tomorrow marks the end.
somewhere in the middle we became the best of friends if you ever need a shoulder.
if you ever need a friend.
i'll be here till the end.
Afriend is someone who can lift your spirits with just their smile.
if i had only one friend left.
i'd want it to be you.

I wondered Lonely as a cloud that Floats
on high o er vales&hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd , A host
of golden daf fodils,
Beside the lake,
beneath the trees,
Fluttering and
dancing in the breeze

freaking life i have !

STRESSED UP WITH EVERYTHING!
OMG!!
i flung my geo.sadsad !!! 6.5/30
so badly done.need to start mugging again.sian =(
TO MY DEAREST FRIEND...
you must rmb our special date okay?
its special for us,isn't it?
hahas.
you arhhs take good care of yourself&also study hard.
I WANT TO SEE YOU IN SCHOOL TOMORROW!!!!

okay la,i very tired already.time for bed.
night !!!!

GOOD JOB PEOPLE !
NPCC RAWKS !
SILVER SILVER SILVER=D
WE MAINTAINED!!!!!!
AREA5 GOODJOB TOO.NO BRONZE ONCE AGAIN.
MY PASSION !

things doesn't turn out right afterall

HATE ; LOVE ?
I fall for you eventually,you didnt treasure.
i said i love you,you igonored.
i really dontknow what i should do next.
i am confused!
i am state of confusion,what she said had affected me deeply.like a knife snab into my heart.
my heart is broken once again.
maybe its expected?i am wondering.
i did so much for you but this is what i eventually got back.
anyway,i chose to let go,yes i love you but just you are&not mine&i am not yours.
i think you have not feel the pain that is in me now.
last again,
i love you kelly
MY TRUE FRIENDS...
special thanks to BeeGeok&ChengWee.
BeeGeok,
thanks for speaking to me&let me know the truth of everything.
sorry to let you end up crying but still a big THANK YOU =D
i seriously appreciate what you told me and now my mind-sets are cleared.
BEEGEOK,YOU ARE MINE!!!!HAHAS.
ChengWee,
thanks for spending your precious study time&chat with me on phone.
i also appreciate it very well.not to worry,i wont call you paikah anymore=D
OHYA !
and also thanks for buying chocolate for me to cheer me up.
i simply love chocolates.hahas.
to the both of them,
simply thanks to you guys&you all are really my true friends.
a wonderful sister&brother i had.
p.s. i love you guys.you guys rawks.
see ya tomorrow.
SCHOOL WORKS
now is school works.
DIE DIE DIE !!!
i flung my chem,the only failure in my class =.=
need to study hard for it again.HAIX !
tml physic test.hope everything goes on well(dont wan tto disappoint MrPeh anymore)
this is a great fall.i need to stand up&start mugging again
THANKS MrPeh to be always there for me.
okay la,its time to get back to my physic.time constraint=D

making everything here strong.

ONE&ONLY...
i am worry of everything.
i am worry you will turn around and run away,
i am worry you will leave me alone.
all these will make me break down into tears.
i am waiting here.
i am scare,my mentality is no longer strong when i thought of it.
i love you-very deeply.
i wish that i am the one.
i am worry i am not the one ='(
i love you

hoping nothing goes wrong

YOU ARE MY ONE&ONLY !
to you my love one:
not to worry so much,
i am sure you will be able to mke it.
no matter its the answer you want or not,
i will always be there for you.

you are my love,
the one&only in my heart.
who is the one you love?i am wondering.
i wants to be your valentine on this valentines' day.
are you willing to?what are you thinking now?
i seriously wondering.

i may not be the prettiest
i may not be perfect in your eyes
i may not be the one you wanted
but what i know is my love for you is true
i love you

to my dearest simone

mone ar mone!
study also can study until sleep.haiiyorhhs.keep awake!!!!
hahas.
study hard girl=D
you will be able to score well.
if you sleep somemore i will....
uh huh.you should know right?hahas.

when i say i love you.i really mean it.

YOU ARE MY SUPERMAN
it had been a longlong time since i blog.
now i am back again=D
busy and stressed-up these days.tests are coming up.scared !!

so tired.had been staying at home,clearing my room&stuffs.later still need to go tuition.dont even know will i have the energy to listen in class not.
hmm.yesterday went for NPCC after school.fun training yesterday.
OH YA !
my dear kelly.not to worry.i am sure you will be able to make it ok?must have confident in yourself&you will make it.you had already give-in your best shot.i have faith in you=D

to you,my love one:
i am desire in you
i am crazy over you
you made me go wild
i love you